Friday, February 20, 2009

Shot of the Day #51: One of those days...

Shot with iphone. Click to enlarge.

Man...isn't Friday supposed to be a day where, on the eve of the weekend, shit is supposed to go RIGHT? Feels more like a "Monday" to me.

Just got back from being, as my friend Yaniv so eloquently put it once, "anally raped in the mouth" at my accountant. I don't know if that translates into actual A.T.M. but I'm feeling every word of that phrase; I went in thinking I was gonna get a nice return, and because of a fucked clause in a residual check from WT2 (Thanks Canada!! Fuckers!!), now I end up having to owe "the man". Was NOT expecting that. Shitfarts!
So all the time spent going through receipts, calculating, re-calculating and then some did NOTHING for the cause, and I'm not only fuming, I'm thinking that job at the strip joint is looking better and better, although my Moobs are not as full and bouncy as they once were (damn you gym!). Still trying to figure out how to fix the situation, but what I thought was gonna be a nice start to the weekend is now a scramble to rejigger our budget and I'm about as well versed with numbers as a donkey is with a rubik's cube. Gonna be fun. I take Banzai out for our usual "round the block" walk to let her stretch her legs and take a shit or 3 (and for me to let off some steam), I notice this portly dude walking towards us with a chocolate Now, since Banzai was attacked a few years back at the park, she hasn't been too friendly with strange dogs and mostly on the defensive, so to avoid a ruckus, I usually pick her up, nod to the passer-by and say in an almost apologetic tone "Sorry, she's not feeling good today" and move on. Now from what I remember, its a law to have your dog leashed up in public (gonna have to look that up now, stay tuned) so I'm wondering why this guy seems so oblivious. I've seen this guy in the past, but always just missed him as he and his dog go inside their apartment complex before we pass, but this time, it was a bit of a stand-off. Banzai slowed upon seeing the dog, the hackles went up and I lifter her for protection (for both of them), and the guy just passes by me, so I said in as friendly a tone as possible "Please put your dog on a leash".

"Well, why don't you shave your beard!"

Um, huh? That's it? That's your retort?

"What does that have to do with anything?" I said.

"Mind your buisness man..."

"No, why don't you keep your dog from attacking mine by doing what you're supoposed to and put it on-"

-and to prove my point, his dog is up on me and Banzai, sniffing aggressively.

"-see? because I dont want your dog to attack mine!" and I turn to the dog: "Fuck off dog!" (in retrospect, I feel bad I yelled at the dog. Sorry, dog)

"Don't talk to my dog like that! Ill fucking kill you!"

Impulse and adrenaline kicked in and Im literally IN this guys face, looking down at his fat maw.

"Go ahead motherfucker. Kill me. I fucking WANT you to. Fucking do it."
(at the very least I wouldnt have to worry about the Taxes then, but would kinda suck leaving Bri, Remy and Banzai alone, so it's an unrealistic request)

"Well...Fuck you man."

A few more F-bombs were exchanged, I think I called him a "Fat fluck" to which he said "Nice use of BIG WORDS!" and he ended up walking away saying "You look like the Unabomber", which, in retrospect, makes little sense. First off, my beard isn't as shaggy as it's been in the past (and it can get REALLY burly) and secondly, didn't the Unabomber have sweet moustache? Dude, get your shitty references straight.

...and that was that. I walked off, Banzai shaking, me shaking a bit too from the intensity of the moment, and I've been in a shitty mood ever since. TGIF, huh?

Here's hoping for a better weekend,



Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home